Comments on: Offering Support: What to Say in a Difficult Situation http://www.jpouch.net/2008/10/21/offering-support-what-to-say-in-a-difficult-situation/ Stories: Ostomy, Ileostomy, Jpouch, Colitis, Crohn's, Surgery and Support Thu, 09 Feb 2012 01:41:43 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3 By: Kristen http://www.jpouch.net/2008/10/21/offering-support-what-to-say-in-a-difficult-situation/#comment-341 Kristen Thu, 23 Oct 2008 15:17:06 +0000 http://ucstory.wordpress.com/?p=568#comment-341 So true, so true! I love people comparing their appendix removal or ACL knee surgery repair to my surgeries :) I'm sorry you are having such a rough go of everything - doesn't seem fair that nothing seems to go your way time and time again. You are dealing with it very well! I'm still waiting to find out about disability myself. Doesn't seem right that on top of dealing with horrible illness we have to deal with financial woes too. I don't think it hit me how difficult the financial stuff would be until I actually stopped getting paid last week. Let me know if my limited lawyer skills can be of any help to you. I think your decision to pursue what you told me in your email is a good one. Kristen So true, so true! I love people comparing their appendix removal or ACL knee surgery repair to my surgeries :)

I’m sorry you are having such a rough go of everything – doesn’t seem fair that nothing seems to go your way time and time again. You are dealing with it very well! I’m still waiting to find out about disability myself. Doesn’t seem right that on top of dealing with horrible illness we have to deal with financial woes too. I don’t think it hit me how difficult the financial stuff would be until I actually stopped getting paid last week.

Let me know if my limited lawyer skills can be of any help to you. I think your decision to pursue what you told me in your email is a good one.

Kristen

]]> By: jenellepower http://www.jpouch.net/2008/10/21/offering-support-what-to-say-in-a-difficult-situation/#comment-340 jenellepower Wed, 22 Oct 2008 00:47:56 +0000 http://ucstory.wordpress.com/?p=568#comment-340 Hi Dennis, I've been following you on your vlog. I haven't been through all the posts yet, but so far it's great. The video really helps make it personal and practical. I find myself being pretty vague with strangers, too. I've run into very awkward situations where I've met acquaintances after my hospitalization and looked so different that it had to be acknowledged, yet I really didn't want to get into detail. Definitely tricky. Jenelle Hi Dennis,

I’ve been following you on your vlog. I haven’t been through all the posts yet, but so far it’s great. The video really helps make it personal and practical. I find myself being pretty vague with strangers, too. I’ve run into very awkward situations where I’ve met acquaintances after my hospitalization and looked so different that it had to be acknowledged, yet I really didn’t want to get into detail. Definitely tricky.

Jenelle

]]> By: jenellepower http://www.jpouch.net/2008/10/21/offering-support-what-to-say-in-a-difficult-situation/#comment-339 jenellepower Wed, 22 Oct 2008 00:44:57 +0000 http://ucstory.wordpress.com/?p=568#comment-339 Hi Erica, I'm sure that since you seem to be very aware of offering support that your caring comes through. Providing support is such a difficult and crucial aspect of chronic illness, yet people rarely feel comfortable asking for what they want. I'm so glad you found it helpful! Jenelle Hi Erica,

I’m sure that since you seem to be very aware of offering support that your caring comes through. Providing support is such a difficult and crucial aspect of chronic illness, yet people rarely feel comfortable asking for what they want. I’m so glad you found it helpful!

Jenelle

]]> By: ucvlog http://www.jpouch.net/2008/10/21/offering-support-what-to-say-in-a-difficult-situation/#comment-338 ucvlog Wed, 22 Oct 2008 00:22:38 +0000 http://ucstory.wordpress.com/?p=568#comment-338 Hi lady, You provide very good suggestions about how people should treat you. I have two surgeries down and my takedown is in December. It's a rough experience and I think outsiders generally want to understand what you are going through but it's really difficult to express that feeling, especially when you don't feel much like talking about it. With strangers, I often find myself not telling them at all about my colitis or surgeries until it's absolutely necessary, partially because I don't want to burden people with my problems. How do I expect them to react to something so terrible? Keep fighting, Dennis Hi lady,
You provide very good suggestions about how people should treat you. I have two surgeries down and my takedown is in December. It’s a rough experience and I think outsiders generally want to understand what you are going through but it’s really difficult to express that feeling, especially when you don’t feel much like talking about it. With strangers, I often find myself not telling them at all about my colitis or surgeries until it’s absolutely necessary, partially because I don’t want to burden people with my problems. How do I expect them to react to something so terrible?

Keep fighting,
Dennis

]]> By: Erica http://www.jpouch.net/2008/10/21/offering-support-what-to-say-in-a-difficult-situation/#comment-337 Erica Tue, 21 Oct 2008 17:28:15 +0000 http://ucstory.wordpress.com/?p=568#comment-337 Thank you for this post, as the sister-in-law of Mark I often struggled to find ways to show support. I know in the beginning it was common for me and others to say "oh, you'll be better soon" or "hope you feel better" - not realizing the magnitude of his illness. I don't think we teach other how to support through chronic illness and so this post is really important for all friends and family to read. Thanks again, and you are looking great 5 months out from surgery! erica Thank you for this post, as the sister-in-law of Mark I often struggled to find ways to show support. I know in the beginning it was common for me and others to say “oh, you’ll be better soon” or “hope you feel better” – not realizing the magnitude of his illness. I don’t think we teach other how to support through chronic illness and so this post is really important for all friends and family to read.

Thanks again, and you are looking great 5 months out from surgery!

erica

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